I have a lot to offer in terms of what I have figured out. But, that doesn’t mean I have it all figured out or that I don’t have my struggles too. As much as I would love to tell y’all that I’m perfect, I am far from it. It occurs to me that it might be helpful to share some of the things that I sill work on myself. After all, I am always telling my clients not to compare themselves to other, especially since those who seem to have it all together might not. I can be a role model with out being perfect, right?
So, I want to share that I’ve really been struggling with my attention for the last week or two. I mean really struggling. It almost feels like I haven’t taken my meds at all. I’ve started doing two a day work outs to try to balance my brain chemistry I’ve moved up my session with my coach so I see him monday morning. I’ve talked some of it out with my wife. I’m eating well and sleeping fantastically. I’m managing my anxiety really well. And, I still can’t seem to sit down and focus on what I want to. (I’m sure you’ll find that this post is indicative of this struggle, as will be even more stream of consciousness than usual.)
What’s to be learned from this? I don’t know. Why am I sharing? Because I don’t know what is to be learned yet. It would be neat and tidy to figure out what’s going on and then share a nice positive outcome. But it feels important to be sharing where I am now. I guess the important thing is that I’m doing what I can, keeping my head up, and fighting the good fight. When this began last week I felt depressed and defeated. Then I simply made the decision to go with it and see what happened. I’m not necessarily more productive this week, but I’m much happier and have a lot more energy. Less desk work, more yard work. Even if all I’m doing is meeting with and helping my clients this week, how bad a week could that really be? I guess I’ve just learned to trust in myself that I will figure it out eventually. In the mean time it doesn’t help me to beat myself up. I’m just going to keep trying to figure it out and keep doing the best that I can.